• Michael & Alex, Sitting In A Tree……

    Posted by on June 29th, 2006 · Comments (7)

    This is what I hear every time that Alex Rodriguez is interviewed by Michael Kay:

    Kay: We’re happy to have New York Yankees great, multiple MVP Award winner, and future Hall of Famer, Alex Rodriguez with us. Alex, thanks for being on the show!

    A-Rod: It’s my pleasure Michael.

    Kay: Alex, you’re the greatest player in the game today. You can run, hit, hit with power, and field – do it all – better than any player in the game can do all those things. But, people “boo” you. I don’t get it? You’re the greatest player today – and will be the greatest player ever when you’re done with your career. I wish that I could have ovaries implanted into my body so that I could have your baby, because I think you’re so great. Why does anyone “boo” you?

    A-Rod: I’m not sure Michael. I know that I wouldn’t “boo” me.

    Kay: Alex, you were the league MVP for the Yankees last year. You had a great ALDS in 2004 against the Twins. You were the A.L. Player of the month for May this year. What’s not to love? If you were a vampire, I would want to be your familiar. Why do people say that you’re not “clutch”?

    A-Rod: I’m not sure Michael. I just know that I am the type of player who cares about trying as hard as I can everyday. Whatever happens after that is whatever it is.

    Kay: I just don’t get it. I mean, I would want you at the plate in any situation. I would want you anywhere. Are you doing anything for Halloween this year? It would be great if we could “trick or treat” together this year – dressed like a groom and his bride. If you say “yes,” I swear, I can get a wedding dress to fit me by then – I’m not kidding.

    A-Rod: I hope to be busy in October. I want to be on a team that wins a World Championship in New York. There’s nothing better that can happen to a player than being on a team that wins in New York.

    Kay: I hope you get that ring Alex. You deserve it. You’re a special player. Some day, everyone is going to realize that they’re watching the best player to ever play the game. I know that I will always cherish the position that I’ve been in these years – to watch you everyday. I want to remember it all and tell it to my children and their children some day – that I saw Alex Rodriguez. Heck, if you ever had hemorrhoids, and had them cut off, I would ask you for them – and I would have them added to a necklace to pass down in my family throughout the years. As far as I’m concerned, nothing you do should be lost or forgotten.

    A-Rod: Well, Michael, I like to leave it all on the field. I like to think that no one works harder than I do. I’m a grinder. I put in lots of repetitions. I get up early in the morning. Just ask my wife, Cynthia.

    Kay: I’m glad that you mentioned Cynthia. She’s so smart – like a lawyer. And, she’s so beautiful – like a fitness model. And, you’re so beautiful too. Do you think that’s why some people resent you?

    A-Rod: I’m not sure Michael. That’s a good question.

    Kay: Well, thanks for your time Alex. You’re the greatest. I know it. I don’t know why others don’t. Maybe they’ll see it after you’re done? I hope so. No one can play the game as great as you do. You had 3 homers and 10 RBI in just one game! But, some people just see what they want to see, I guess? It’s just awful that you’re not appreciated more.

    Am I the only one who hears this each time? Is it just me? Or, is Kay’s A-Rod genuflecting getting so overt that it’s intolerable?

    Comments on Michael & Alex, Sitting In A Tree……

    1. rbj
      June 29th, 2006 | 11:57 am

      Fortunately, with EI, they cut the feed right after the game so I’ve never had to hear that stuff.

    2. June 29th, 2006 | 12:21 pm

      I despise Michael Kay with all of my being and therefore do not listen to him beyond the required 3 hours (if the game is manageable that is) of a game.

      Actually, I’ve given up on Sports Radio…most broadcasters just irritate me.

    3. rbs10025
      June 29th, 2006 | 2:47 pm

      I haven’t listened to Kay since he he shifted from radio to TV. (Yes, I know he does ESPN radio. I think I’ve heard that show once.) So if he’s always this obsequious with A-Rod, I wouldn’t know. But…

      In your sample dialog, all of Kay’s questions are 2-3 times longer that A-Rod’s supposed answers.

      Now that does sound like the Kay I used to know.

      But if Kay’s always obsequious with A-Rod, that probably balances all the dishing I recall he used to do of Moose. (And maybe still does?)

    4. MJ
      June 29th, 2006 | 3:09 pm

      You do realize, Steve, that you just gave some sicko with an eBay obsession the inspiration to go find ARod’s doctor to see about that hemorrhoid necklace. It’s probably the same guy that has the George Brett necklace of the same variety.

    5. Athos333
      June 29th, 2006 | 3:43 pm

      I’d be so happy just to have Kitty & Singleton everyday. Pretty much all other commentators annoy me….

    6. JeremyM
      June 29th, 2006 | 10:29 pm

      I agree, sports talk is a a wasteland, and espn is awful as well. Thank God for blogs like this one!

    7. JeremyM
      June 29th, 2006 | 10:31 pm

      Oops, I should have added “rack me!”

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