I would make sure I blamed Brian Cashman for not re-signing Pavano to another 4 years, and $40 million.

Because it would somehow be his fault, just as Jeff Weaver pitching dominant ball for the Cards and Kenny Rogers pitching dominant ball for the Tigers was his fault in the post-season of 2006, and Joe Contreras pitching dominant ball for the White Sox was his fault in the post-season of 2005.

I would only kill myself after Kei Igawa pitches the Padres to the title in 2012.

Because that would mean the Mayans are right.

Nothing… nothing in sports would match the 04 alcs… when i kept telling myself tonights the night… when i was happy to see Rivera in to close games 4 and 5 and the reversal of fortunes..

i cannot have another moment in my fan-life that will be more soul crushing.. as a fan losing to Pavano will suck.. but wont come close to 04… that pain and wound is fresh… part of the reason i can never accept Damon as a Yankee… oh well..

If that happens, the New York Rangers will immediately vacate Madison Square Garden and play their subsequent games in Hell, since it will have most surely frozen over.

my first reaction would be to throw myself off the Macombs Dam Bridge immediately following the game. But, I know that would then deprive those who like to bellyache about my blogging. So, I would probably count to ten and come up with another plan to relieve my pain.

That was flippin hilarious

There would be no more depressing end to the Yanks season than if they got bounced in the ALDS at the hands of Carl Pavano.

I would happily bribe his hotel’s concierge to make sure he came down with food poisoning that day.